Iced Cinnamon Roll Entrails - a DIY of sorts

Because I fucked the cinnamon rolls.  Hard.

As always, the expectation:

And the reality:

The mistakes were many and all my own.  What was edible was delicious.  They smelled heavenly and the girls were obsessed...  But not so much after they saw them...  Well, Secunda was on board, but she's awesome like that.

Best big sis ever.  We love her so much.

There were lots of words and instructions on the back of the bag, all of which I ignored.  I was prepared for disaster, so I used my Gross Cookie Sheet.  But I was not prepared for THIS.  As a comparison:

Eesh.

Live, and learn to read the directions COMPLETELY.

So I "Made" Some "Jewelry"... And it doesn't suck.

And by "made", I mean "wrapped some wire around it" and by "jewelry" I mean "rocks the girls found in a drawer."

I've never wrapped anything before, so I didn't know I couldn't do it.  I found out, though.

The agates are from Montana, I think.  They are really beautiful when they aren't terribly photographed and covered with greasy fingerprints (mine).  Here's the back:

It's a hot mess.  But the girls don't care and new pretties are ALWAYS good.  They go in order, Prima's is the dark one, Secunda's is the pretty orange one and Tertia wanted the white one.  I just used some yarn to string them.  I have a friend (ANDIE!!) who actually went to SCHOOL to be craftier than the rest of us.  I haven't decided whether to send the pic to her...  

I was terrified to try it and it doesn't suck.  I'm putting this down as a "win". 

Pinterest FAIL -or- Fuck Apple Ring Pancakes

I love Pinterest.  I really do.  It has made me a better mom, a more courageous artist, a funnier cynic, a more creative teacher.  So, I find cool ideas to try for the kiddos that are simple and appealing to the under-6 set.  I was absolutely entranced with the idea of these beautiful Apple Ring Pancakes from Gone Walkabout.

Beautiful. And not mine.

And I love Fails.  Of every kind.  Mine, yours, theirs.  I'm especially pleased when the fails are so epic, the attempts so sincere, and the perpetrator so able to laugh at themselves that it gets posted somewhere.  Like here, for instance.

Without further denial, here is my Apple Ring Debacle:

Fantastic.  Stuck all to shit on my non-stick griddle that used to be my best friend.  Used the recipe from Joy of Cooking for pancakes and the batter was luscious.  But fuck apple rings.  Fuck them right to hell.

And to prove I can actually cook at the level of a prison inmate, I made a jillion silver dollar cakes for everyone.

With powdered sugar instead of syrup because syrup is gross.  And I'm gonna post the shit out of this because it's just so sad.  And HILARIOUS.